This is one of the best talks I’ve ever heard. It is one of those group sessions where GD opens to a page in A Course In Miracles, starts reading it, and opens up a discussion in the group based on the lines. This is a talk I kept visiting once…twice…thrice and every time I did, I became more aware of acting out from specialness. Eventually I just sat down with my journal and started making a note of all the places where I play out this specialness, pausing it at very intervals. GD has so incisively pulled out the many different angles to this subject that it is one hell of an ego buster! Though of course, he does it with his characteristic humour that softens some of the blow 🙂
I invite you to hear it with this context – Are you aware of the many ways in which you try to be special? Do you see how specialness is actually a curse, a burden? Going through this audio one thing is certain – you will start seeing the many ways in which you have built an egoistic structure that commands you to be special.
Here is the audio (shared with permission from GD):
[Duration: 39:35 minutes, Talk date: December 4, 2009]
Osho has a very beautiful extract on “Specialness” in his book, Sermons in Stones:
I do not feel ordinary – I am.
The people who have talents, the gifted, the geniuses – they also suffer the same problem that you are suffering because they forget that the whole existence is ordinary. A sunrise, howsoever beautiful, is pure ordinariness. A sky full of stars does not feel in any way special. A rosebush full of beautiful flowers and fragrance is just part of the ordinary existence. The talented people get into trouble because they forget their relationship with existence. They become confined and imprisoned in their small talents. What are your talents and what are your geniuses? Because you can paint, you are a genius? Look at the butterflies, look at the flowers, look at the sky when the sun is setting – the whole existence is so colorful. And because you have painted a small canvas, you have become special. And what have you painted? The existence has to be remembered; then you will not get caught in the net of an egoistic feeling, that ”I am special.” The moment you feel you are special, you have lost contact with life, with love, with the totality of the whole – you are alone.
A true genius does not know, does not feel that he is special. That is the criterion whether he is a true genius or not. If he feels that he is special, he’s not a true genius. The very feeling of specialness arises out of your inferiority. The more inferior you feel, the more you try to pretend, to pose your specialness.
Update: The link to the audio track has been updated since it was not accessible earlier.